Apr 062015
 

Title: Rhapsody in Ass Major – Chapter 10
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters:  Cormac Hawke ♂, Artemis Hawke ♂, Bethany Hawke ♀, Carver Hawke ♂, Anders ♂, Fenris ♂
Rating: E (L2 N4 S4 V0 D1)
Warnings: Oh my god Cormac, teh gay, buttsex, zero relationship skills
Notes: At last, the party comes to an end… More shenanigans to follow.
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Apr 062015
 

Title: Rhapsody in Ass Major – Chapter 9
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters:  Cormac Hawke ♂, Artemis Hawke ♂, Anton Hawke ♂, Anders ♂, Cullen ♂, Fenris ♂
Rating: E (L2 N4 S4 V0 D1)
Warnings: Anders is fucked the fuck right up, Artemis isn't much better, oh my god Cormac, teh gay, buttsex, organ-fondling good times, zero relationship skills
Notes: Jizz! On! Everything! Apparently we broke this in such a way that it's the orgasm chapter. For everyone except Artemis, who came first.
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Apr 062015
 

Title: Rhapsody in Ass Major – Chapter 8
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters:  Cormac Hawke ♂, Artemis Hawke ♂, Anton Hawke ♂, Anders ♂, Cullen ♂, Fenris ♂
Rating: E (L2 N4 S4 V0 D1)
Warnings: Drinking, Anders is fucked the fuck right up, Artemis isn't much better, lots of snogging, teh gay, buttsex, zero relationship skills
Notes: So, we heard you like smut… *coughs* Cullen gets laid! The threesome in the cellar becomes a foursome! Hot hilarity ensues in all cases!
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Apr 062015
 

Title: Rhapsody in Ass Major – Chapter 7
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters: Artemis Hawke ♂, Anders ♂, Fenris ♂
Rating: E (L2 N3 S4 V1 D1)
Warnings: Drinking, Anders is fucked the fuck right up, Artemis isn't much better, lots of snogging, blowjobs, zero relationship skills
Notes: The party downstairs continues, and Fenris learns that mages do have some uses.
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Apr 062015
 

Title: Rhapsody in Ass Major – Chapter 2
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters: Cormac Hawke ♂, Artemis Hawke ♂, Anton Hawke ♂, Anders ♂, Fenris ♂
Rating: E (L3 N4 S4 V0 D1)
Warnings: Drunken mayhem, teh gay, inadvertent magical encouragement, inadvertent exhibitionism/voyeurism
Notes: Drunken mayhem, loud sex, and Anton isn't getting laid, which isn't fair at all.
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Apr 052015
 

Title: Rhapsody In Ass Major
Co-Conspirator: TumblrMaverikLoki
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters: Cormac Hawke , Artemis Hawke , Anton Hawke , Bethany Hawke , Carver Hawke , Leandra Amell , Gamlen Amell , Anders , Aveline , Cullen , Donnic , Fenris , Isabela , Merrill , Sebastian , Varric , Ella , Jethann , Keran , Meredith Stannard , Orana , Orsino , Raleigh Samson , Serendipity , Tallis , Varania , Theron Mahariel , Kallian Tabris , Alim Surana , Natia Brosca , Nathaniel Howe , Gytha , Zevran Arainai , Cassandra Pentaghast, 
Rating: E (L3 N4 S4 V3 D1)
Warnings: Smiting, buggery, zero relationship skills, gesticulating with ham, gesticulating with dildoes, is everyone in this fic bisexual?, we did bad shit to canon, butts. did I mention butts? because butts., sass & class & ass, wow damn you can say that in Latin, non-explicit het, non-explicit femslash, terribly explicit slash
Notes: DA2 AU in which both Carver and Bethany survive, and there are three older Hawke siblings. And all of them are Purple. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll want to set Fenris on fire a couple times. Nobody knows what the fuck they're doing, but they'll do it anyway! At least people usually know who the fuck they're doing… Except that one time. Starts cracky, but gets semi-serious, decently quickly. Never gets entirely serious, because hello, Purple Hawke does not 'serious'. Or at least three of them don't all at once. IT'S A GODDAMN ROMANCE. JUST READ IT.

"Why does everyone keep saying 'ass'?" said either Anton or the pile of blankets in his shape.

(Fucking AO3 just deleted the 33 chapters of this that we posted in the last month. And now I'm posting it here, JUST IN CASE JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. This master post will take on new chapters as I manage to post them, so it should stack up pretty quick over the next day or two.)

Update: This master post will include the entire series. Links to AO3 for the parts I didn't have any part in writing.
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Mar 092015
 

Title: 5+1: The Flagpole
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters: Anders ♂, Hawke ♂, Karl ♂, Nathaniel ♂, Isabela ♀
Rating: E (L2 N4 S3 V0 D1)
Warnings: Dick jokes, smut, prostitution
Notes: Anders isn't just well-hung, he's outrageously hung, and it's actually a problem. (This started as a joke in Rhapsody, and then it got out of hand.)
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Mar 072015
 

Title: If You Blow Chunks and He Comes Back…
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters: Anders ♂, Hawke♂, Fenris ♂
Rating: E (L2 N4 S4 V0 D1)
Warnings: Vomit. Liek woah. And the internet is for porn, dysfunctional relationships are dysfunctional, Anders has some fucking issues.
Notes: Anders explains to Fenris, over a bottle of Antivan brandy, the critically mortifying circumstances by which he ended up throwing up in Hawke's bed. Fenris is thoroughly entertained. (Established Anders/Hawke and Fenris/Anders, with a bit of ongoing rivalry.)
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Mar 012015
 

Title: Until It Hurts
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters: Fenris ♂, Anders ♂, M!Hawke ♂, Carver ♂
Rating: E (L2 N4 S4 V0 D0)
Warnings: Dysfunctional assholes are dysfunctional, the internet is for porn, Carver wants brain bleach, legendary warden stamina, waking the neighbours
Notes: Fenris hasn't been able to figure out what the hell Anders is doing with Hawke. More in the sense of 'why' than 'what', although a little bit of the 'what' answers the 'why'. Anders finally ends up telling the story of the first time he and Hawke did interesting naked things.
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