Artist Problems, Now With Art

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Mar 242018
 

Title: Artist Problems, Now With Art
Fandom: None
Characters: Some guy ♂
Rating: G ( L0 N0 S0 V0 D0 )
Warnings: None
Notes: I managed to install a version of the software I'm completely unfamiliar with and about 0.002% of my content library on my laptop. I have none of my save files. I hate this stupid fucking UI. Why is all the skin I can find for these figures (as in I wouldn't have to re-buy it) white? Anyway, I pulled this out of my ass in like 45 minutes, and it's terrible. TEN DAYS OF THIS AAAAAUUUUGH. i can't wait to have my shit back. this is horrible. (Sorry for the art spam! Finally going through the backlog of shit that had to wait because my computer was on fire!)
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[MASTER] Rhapsody In Ass Major

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Apr 052015
 

Title: Rhapsody In Ass Major
Co-Conspirator: TumblrMaverikLoki
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters: Cormac Hawke ♂, Artemis Hawke ♂, Anton Hawke ♂, Bethany Hawke ♀, Carver Hawke ♂, Leandra Amell ♀, Gamlen Amell ♂, Anders ♂, Aveline ♀, Cullen ♂, Donnic ♂, Fenris ♂, Isabela ♀, Merrill ♀, Sebastian ♂, Varric ♂, Ella ♀, Jethann ♂, Keran ♂, Meredith Stannard ♀, Orana ♀, Orsino ♂, Raleigh Samson ♂, Serendipity ⚧, Tallis ♀, Varania ♀, Theron Mahariel ♂, Kallian Tabris ♀, Alim Surana ♂, Natia Brosca ♀, Nathaniel Howe ♂, Gytha ♀, Zevran Arainai ♂, Cassandra Pentaghast♀, 
Rating: E (L3 N4 S4 V3 D1)
Warnings: Smiting, buggery, zero relationship skills, gesticulating with ham, gesticulating with dildoes, is everyone in this fic bisexual?, we did bad shit to canon, butts. did I mention butts? because butts., sass & class & ass, wow damn you can say that in Latin, non-explicit het, non-explicit femslash, terribly explicit slash
Notes: DA2 AU in which both Carver and Bethany survive, and there are three older Hawke siblings. And all of them are Purple. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll want to set Fenris on fire a couple times. Nobody knows what the fuck they're doing, but they'll do it anyway! At least people usually know who the fuck they're doing… Except that one time. Starts cracky, but gets semi-serious, decently quickly. Never gets entirely serious, because hello, Purple Hawke does not 'serious'. Or at least three of them don't all at once. IT'S A GODDAMN ROMANCE. JUST READ IT.

"Why does everyone keep saying 'ass'?" said either Anton or the pile of blankets in his shape.

(Fucking AO3 just deleted the 33 chapters of this that we posted in the last month. And now I'm posting it here, JUST IN CASE JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. This master post will take on new chapters as I manage to post them, so it should stack up pretty quick over the next day or two.)

Update: This master post will include the entire series. Links to AO3 for the parts I didn't have any part in writing.
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[Master] Nicholas Darby, Raver Messiah

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Sep 172014
 

Title: Nicholas Darby, Raver Messiah – Master Post
Fandom: Nicoverse
Characters: Nico, the Magdalenes, a bunch of angels, some regular folks
Rating: Rating: G to Rating: R
Warnings: Blasphemy. Lots of it. Kneecap-busting club-kid amazons. Naked dudes. Malleable genders. Sugar as the root power of all things good and right.
Notes: It's the 21st century, and Christ has returned. As a rave DJ, with a taste for happy hardcore, by the name of Nicholas Darby. Surrounding himself with a highly-skilled team of women, a few angels, and selected members of his city's homeless population, he devotes himself to charity, good works, better parties, and building a social framework that will provide for all humankind.

Art is ordered by creation date. Fic is… I'm trying to get it into actual chronological order of the stories, but I have no idea when most of them happen, except vaguely in relation to each other. (See also: how old is Nico? What year is it?)
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Winterborn 2014 Calendar

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Nov 032013
 

… Is now available!

Did you grow up with a different sense of the fae? A darker understanding than the pop culture of your childhood presented? Not so convinced they're honourable, sweet, merry pranksters? This calendar is for you. Twelve months of images, featuring three families of the sorts of fae your parents should have warned you about. Four redcaps, eight lhiannan, and two sídhe drink, fight, and dance their way across the pages, with brief interludes for family and tradition.

Q: Which countries does this contain holidays for?
A: The UK and US. If there's enough demand (read: any), I'll make one with German and Canadian holidays. Yes, guys, I do know where my fans are, thanks.

Q: Are there any things you'd warn about in here?
A: Drinking and fighting. A little bit of gore, in February. Gents, ladies, and gender-neutral characters. Shirtless gents and a girl in a mini.

This product is no longer available.
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Poor Artist is Poor! $5 Bust Commissions Sale! Limited time!

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Sep 102013
 

Title: $5 Bust Commissions
Fandom: All of them!
Characters: You tell me!
Rating: G- (L0 N1 S0 V0 D0)
Warnings: Shirtless dudes and ladies with low necklines are likely.
Notes: Details and demo images are under the cut. I'm only accepting 12 of these, right now, so if you want one, type quickly.
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Why is everything broken!?

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Jul 022013
 

*coughs* So, a bit of an update. You'll notice that this archive isn't where it used to be, as of today. That's because I've spent pretty much every waking moment since Friday (aside from some fantastical good times with DK and, later that day, with my mum) getting the hell off Blogger.

I know, I know… "But, Ywain, why would you want to leave an awesome site that has done you nothing but good, all these years?" Well, funny thing. I produce a lot of adult content. Sometimes, people pay me for it. Google just changed the terms of service for Blogger to prevent 'monetization' of 'adult content'. Since nobody has any idea exactly what they mean, it seemed like a good idea to cut and run, before they decided I was breaking the new rules.

Almost everything I've moved has made the transition, gracefully. Almost. There's probably a few links I haven't fixed yet, and some of the redirects may be screwed up. If you find anything spectacularly broken, leave a comment on this post, and I'll try to fix it.

Also, the sidebar may be loading at the bottom of the page, in anything other than Firefox, and I can't figure out why. If you develop a clue, please share.

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[Master Post] Glass

 art, fic, meta  No Responses »
Dec 142010
 

Title: Glass
Fandom: Viridian Legacy
Characters: All of them. It's a master post.
Rating: Check ratings on individual entries.
Warnings: Check warnings on individual entries.
Notes: None of this is in order, yet. There's not enough to work with. But when there is, I'll start adding years and working the bugs out.
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Sky – The book is out.

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Oct 142010
 

After many months of insanity, some editing, some cursing, and some getting completely fed up, Sky is out. No shit.

Sky (print), 227 pgs, $12.50

Highly theoretical ebook edition will be out when I get around to it. If you notice any really glaring errors, let me know, so I can fix them for the second edition. Perils of not being able to afford a proper editor…

Autographed Copies:
So, that said, there are a few people who have asked for autographed copies, and to save on shipping, I'm going to try to do all of those at once. Cost for the book will be exactly the same, but shipping will be a little more, because it's gotta come to me, and then go back out to you. If you're interested in this option, drop me a message before 10/28 with your address (or at least the city), so I can estimate the shipping cost for you, before you commit to actually paying it. I'm looking to place the bulk order before Halloween, but shipping to me has the potential to take 6-8 weeks, so … yeah. If I get them to you before Christmas, it'll be an act of god.

That said, there are two autographed copies I'm putting on hold, for the winners of this ludicrous fanworks contest I'm about to start up. Pompous ass? Me? Yeah. But, I've got at least five fans, so it's worth a shot.

Ludicrous Fanworks Contest:
Prizes: An autographed copy of Sky. (One for best fic, one for best art.)
Submissions from: 2010.10.15 – 2010.11.30
Winner announced: 2010.12.05

Theme: Fuck canon. Seriously. In the ear. As long as it's got at least one character from Sky, I'll count it. Do what you will. Bend the world to your whims…

How to enter: I'll take stuff however you can get it to me, and all entries will be reposted in a master list, with your names attached to them, so everyone can admire your awesome work. Expect to hear from me within 36 hours on any entry made, in any format. If I don't respond to say I got it, assume I didn't and try a different method.

Rules:
1. It's gotta have at least one character from Sky.
2. I'll take up to three entries per person, since there are so few of you, and most of you are ridiculously creative people…
3. You can NOT win in both categories, but you can enter both.

[Master Post] Corybantic Dance Redux

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May 062010
 

Title: Corybantic Dance Redux
Fandom: CD2
Characters: Quentin, Mike, Jasper, Spark (other characters mentioned, but not appearing)
Rating: G--R
Warnings: Violence, hospitals, expletives, drugs, kid sister, Korean jokes, mom jokes…
Notes: It's a bildungsroman. Story of some kids in high school who then grow up to live their dreams, in unexpected ways. The original Corybantic Dance was an epic-length HSAU Naruto fanfic. It got so damn bizarre, we just refit it as original fic, but never re-released the core. Credit for Jasper, Donna, Adam, and Colin goes to my former co-author, Runawayballista.
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[Master Post] Mitarashi Games

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May 062010
 

Title: Mitarashi Games
Fandom: Mitarashi Games
Characters: Mouse, Meeps, Jester, Roy, Ko
Rating: G--R
Warnings: Meeps has some hell of a mouth on him.
Notes: Mitarashi Games is a story about five guys trying to make a video game that's actually good, as opposed to the knockoffs their company has been producing for the last decade.
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