Title: Rhapsody In Ass Major
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters: Cormac Hawke ♂, Artemis Hawke ♂, Anton Hawke ♂, Bethany Hawke ♀, Carver Hawke ♂, Leandra Amell ♀, Gamlen Amell ♂, Anders ♂, Aveline ♀, Cullen ♂, Donnic ♂, Fenris ♂, Isabela ♀, Merrill ♀, Sebastian ♂, Varric ♂, Ella ♀, Jethann ♂, Keran ♂, Meredith Stannard ♀, Orana ♀, Orsino ♂, Raleigh Samson ♂, Serendipity ⚧, Tallis ♀, Varania ♀, Theron Mahariel ♂, Kallian Tabris ♀, Alim Surana ♂, Natia Brosca ♀, Nathaniel Howe ♂, Gytha ♀, Zevran Arainai ♂, Cassandra Pentaghast♀,
Rating: E (L3 N4 S4 V3 D1)
Warnings: Smiting, buggery, zero relationship skills, gesticulating with ham, gesticulating with dildoes, is everyone in this fic bisexual?, we did bad shit to canon, butts. did I mention butts? because butts., sass & class & ass, wow damn you can say that in Latin, non-explicit het, non-explicit femslash, terribly explicit slash
Notes: DA2 AU in which both Carver and Bethany survive, and there are three older Hawke siblings. And all of them are Purple. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll want to set Fenris on fire a couple times. Nobody knows what the fuck they’re doing, but they’ll do it anyway! At least people usually know who the fuck they’re doing… Except that one time. Starts cracky, but gets semi-serious, decently quickly. Never gets entirely serious, because hello, Purple Hawke does not ‘serious’. Or at least three of them don’t all at once. IT’S A GODDAMN ROMANCE. JUST READ IT.
"Why does everyone keep saying ‘ass’?" said either Anton or the pile of blankets in his shape.
(Fucking AO3 just deleted the 33 chapters of this that we posted in the last month. And now I’m posting it here, JUST IN CASE JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. This master post will take on new chapters as I manage to post them, so it should stack up pretty quick over the next day or two.)
Update: This master post will include the entire series. Links to AO3 for the parts I didn’t have any part in writing.