Title: Rhapsody in Ass Major – Chapter 5
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters: Cormac Hawke ♂, Artemis Hawke ♂, Anton Hawke ♂, Anders ♂, Cullen ♂, Fenris ♂
Rating: T (L2 N0 S0 V1 D1)
Warnings: Drinking, partying, Anders is fucked the fuck right up, Artemis isn't much better, unexpected Templar
Notes: Part II: The Ball! Also, Anton getting his mack on. Finally.
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Title: Rhapsody in Ass Major – Chapter 4
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters: Cormac Hawke ♂, Artemis Hawke ♂, Anton Hawke ♂, Carver Hawke ♂, Anders ♂, Aveline ♀, Fenris ♂, Isabela ♀, Merrill ♀, Varric ♂
Rating: T (L2 N2 S0 V0 D0)
Warnings: Exhaustion, brotherly love, zero relationship skills, dick jokes
Notes: Getting out of the Deep Roads. The joy of being outside. Does anyone remember the last time we slept?
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Title: Rhapsody in Ass Major – Chapter 4
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters: Cormac Hawke ♂, Artemis Hawke ♂, Anton Hawke ♂, Carver Hawke ♂, Anders ♂, Aveline ♀, Fenris ♂, Isabela ♀, Merrill ♀, Varric ♂
Rating: T (L2 N2 S0 V0 D1)
Warnings: Zero relationship skills, exercises in pants-free manoeuvring, PTSD, Justice!Anders
Notes: The morning after the night before. Lots of hangovers. A bit of getting trapped in the Deep Roads.
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Title: Rhapsody in Ass Major – Chapter 2
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters: Cormac Hawke ♂, Artemis Hawke ♂, Anton Hawke ♂, Anders ♂, Fenris ♂
Rating: E (L3 N4 S4Â V0 D1)
Warnings: Drunken mayhem, teh gay, inadvertent magical encouragement, inadvertent exhibitionism/voyeurism
Notes: Drunken mayhem, loud sex, and Anton isn't getting laid, which isn't fair at all.
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Title: Rhapsody in Ass Major – Chapter 1
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters: Cormac Hawke ♂, Artemis Hawke ♂, Anton Hawke ♂, Anders ♂, Fenris ♂, Varric ♂
Rating: T (L2 N2 S2 V1 D0)
Warnings: Sleep groping, gesticulating with swords, glowy blue motherfuckers, dick jokes
Notes: "Why does everyone keep saying 'ass'?" said either Anton or the pile of blankets in his shape. The three brothers Hawke, and their ludicrous adventures in ass-grabbing good times.
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Title: Rhapsody In Ass Major
Co-Conspirator: MaverikLoki
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters: Cormac Hawke ♂, Artemis Hawke ♂, Anton Hawke ♂, Bethany Hawke ♀, Carver Hawke ♂, Leandra Amell ♀, Gamlen Amell ♂, Anders ♂, Aveline ♀, Cullen ♂, Donnic ♂, Fenris ♂, Isabela ♀, Merrill ♀, Sebastian ♂, Varric ♂, Ella ♀, Jethann ♂, Keran ♂, Meredith Stannard ♀, Orana ♀, Orsino ♂, Raleigh Samson ♂, Serendipity ⚧, Tallis ♀, Varania ♀, Theron Mahariel ♂, Kallian Tabris ♀, Alim Surana ♂, Natia Brosca ♀, Nathaniel Howe ♂, Gytha ♀, Zevran Arainai ♂, Cassandra Pentaghast♀,Â
Rating: E (L3 N4 S4Â V3 D1)
Warnings: Smiting, buggery, zero relationship skills, gesticulating with ham, gesticulating with dildoes, is everyone in this fic bisexual?, we did bad shit to canon, butts. did I mention butts? because butts., sass & class & ass, wow damn you can say that in Latin, non-explicit het, non-explicit femslash, terribly explicit slash
Notes:Â DA2 AU in which both Carver and Bethany survive, and there are three older Hawke siblings. And all of them are Purple. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll want to set Fenris on fire a couple times. Nobody knows what the fuck they're doing, but they'll do it anyway! At least people usually know who the fuck they're doing… Except that one time. Starts cracky, but gets semi-serious, decently quickly. Never gets entirely serious, because hello, Purple Hawke does not 'serious'. Or at least three of them don't all at once. IT'S A GODDAMN ROMANCE. JUST READ IT.
"Why does everyone keep saying 'ass'?" said either Anton or the pile of blankets in his shape.
(Fucking AO3 just deleted the 33 chapters of this that we posted in the last month. And now I'm posting it here, JUST IN CASE JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. This master post will take on new chapters as I manage to post them, so it should stack up pretty quick over the next day or two.)
Update: This master post will include the entire series. Links to AO3 for the parts I didn't have any part in writing.
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Title: If You Blow Chunks and He Comes Back…
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters: Anders ♂, Hawke♂, Fenris ♂
Rating: E (L2 N4 S4 V0 D1)
Warnings: Vomit. Liek woah. And the internet is for porn, dysfunctional relationships are dysfunctional, Anders has some fucking issues.
Notes: Anders explains to Fenris, over a bottle of Antivan brandy, the critically mortifying circumstances by which he ended up throwing up in Hawke's bed. Fenris is thoroughly entertained. (Established Anders/Hawke and Fenris/Anders, with a bit of ongoing rivalry.)
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Title: The Soggy Set-Up
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters: Anders ♂, Varric ♂, Fenris ♂, Aveline ♀, Merrill ♀, Isabela ♀, Irving ♂, Greagoir ♂
Rating: T (L2 N2 S0 V0 D1)
Warnings: Non-consensual voyeurism, Anders has no sense of self-preservation, Templars making trouble
Notes: Anders tells a story of his time in the tower. Do we remember Greta and her trouble with the Templars, from the Mage Origin? Greta gets a happy ending, Anders gets dragged naked through the hall, and Irving ends up with an awful lot of ammunition.
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Title: Until It Hurts
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters: Fenris ♂, Anders ♂, M!Hawke ♂, Carver ♂
Rating: E (L2 N4 S4 V0 D0)
Warnings: Dysfunctional assholes are dysfunctional, the internet is for porn, Carver wants brain bleach, legendary warden stamina, waking the neighbours
Notes: Fenris hasn't been able to figure out what the hell Anders is doing with Hawke. More in the sense of 'why' than 'what', although a little bit of the 'what' answers the 'why'. Anders finally ends up telling the story of the first time he and Hawke did interesting naked things.
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Title: The Unintended Consequences of Morning
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters: Fenris ♂, Anders ♂
Rating: E (L2 N4 S4 V0 D0)
Warnings: Dysfunctional assholes are dysfunctional, the internet is for porn, mistaken identity, creative uses of Lyrium Ghost
Notes: Fenris decides to wake Anders up with a blowjob. Everything goes straight to hell. Still ends in orgasms, so it's all good. (I feel like I should mention I'm not ignoring my commissions queue, but the room that computer is in is cold enough I can see my breath. Back as soon as the weather stops sucking and I can sit at my desk.)
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