[ Master Post ]
Title: Rhapsody in Ass Major – Chapter 360
Co-Conspirator: 
MaverikLoki
Fandom: Dragon Age
Characters: Artemis Hawke ♂, Anders ♂, Fenris ♂
Rating: E (L2 N4 S4 V0 D1)
Warnings: The internet is for porn
Notes: Artemis decides he has an even better idea. Fenris isn't sure about it, but Anders is willing to give it a try.
"I think we should ravish the judge," Anders decided, slowly unfolding himself. "For the sake of his objectivity, of course, and maybe to give the party next door something to think about."
"It's not exactly like you or I are loud," Fenris reminded him, straightening his back. "And my mage is very subtle in his sounds."
"Perhaps in his sounds, but not in some other regards." Anders's eyebrows flicked up suggestively. "And I think we've gotten him less than entirely quiet on a few occasions."
Artemis stretched his legs out on the bed, rubbing Anders's thigh with the back of his foot. "I like the way you think," he said, biting his lip.
Not to be outdone, Fenris unfurled from his pretzelled state and crawled over to his husband, his hand smoothing over Artemis's chest and up to wrap around his throat. He didn't squeeze yet, merely stroked the soft skin there with the pads of his fingers and watched his mage melt under him. "This is true," Fenris hummed. "I remember pulling some interesting sounds out of you when I held your breath in my hand."
Fenris's hand glowed but still didn't press into skin, and Artemis all but whimpered. "Okay, yes, I like the way you think, too," he said.
"Hear that?" Fenris said to Anders over his shoulder. "I think the judge favours me."
"The judge isn't done with you yet," Artemis reminded him. "And the judge is also still wearing pants, which is a travesty."
"The judge only gets to judge one of us, because I'm not touching him while you're doing that," Anders said, with a shrug, sitting up and pulling his knees up. "I'm not doing anything that might end in an accident that could kill one of us. Okay, it's probably pretty hard to kill me, but I worry about the two of you. Mostly him." He gestured at Artemis. "I don't doubt the two of you can keep it together, for that. I've watched you do it. I do doubt the three of us can."
"So, you admit you're the problem?" Fenris asked, with a faintly antagonistic smile.
"The problem is that you can't read minds," Anders shot back. "I don't actually want to get between the two of you. You know that, right? This is just for fun."
And in a way, Fenris supposed he had known it, but the way Anders went on, sometimes, he still had the occasional doubt. "If you wanted to get between the two of us, I'd prefer you did it on your knees. And there are much better ways to drive us apart than seducing both of us in the same evening."
Fenris's hand still glowed where it touched Artemis, at least until Artemis's hand on his arm brought his attention to it. Fenris's hand became solid again, non-glowing skin against non-glowing skin. "Anders is right," Artie murmured to his husband. "There are other ways we can do this. Other ways we have done this." Artemis stretched up to nuzzle at one pointed ear. "And you get to have me all to yourself later. You know that." Artie bit the ear's tip just to watch it twitch.
Fenris made a noise somewhere between a purr and a growl.
"I could get on my knees if that's what you want," Anders offered, his smile just this side of defiant. "Or did Messere Elf prefer his own tongue?" Fenris's next sound was definitely a growl. "I'm teasing. Relax."
"And I thank you two for not bringing any chocolate into my bed," Artemis joked, trying to defuse the tension he could still feel in Fenris's shoulders. "That is murder to get out of bedsheets, no matter how tasty."
"You say this like you've had the experience!" Anders marvelled, settling onto his elbows and knees in the middle of the bed. "Your own, or were you cleaning up after one of your siblings?" He didn't say 'brothers' this time, figuring chocolate might actually be on Bethany's list of things to do. Bethany and chocolate… that was almost appealing, now that he thought about it. Aside from the part where Cormac would knock all his teeth in and never come back to bed.
"Anton," Artemis muttered. "The messy little shit. I swear he did it on purpose, too."
"Oh, well, if it was Anton, I'm sure he did." Anders snorted. "I'll let the two of you work out where you want me. Justice and I don't mind, as long as there's some lyrium at some point. I don't mind even if we don't get a taste, but he gets a little excited being this close."
"Justice has already had a taste of lyrium, tonight," Fenris reminded him, fingers unlacing Artemis's trousers.
"And I've already gotten quite a mouthful of Tevinter sausage cream. Maybe I should move on to spicy Fereldan horseradish." Anders shrugged, ass in the air, as he rested his chin on his hands. "Either way, I've got some doubts the chorizo has a place in this party." He glanced toward the wall as another of Cormac's screams spilled through, a bit muffled. "I really hope they don't break him too badly."
"That's why we have a healer next door," Artemis reminded him. He paused to listen for a moment and then shrugged. "That doesn't sound half as frightening as some of the things I usually hear him scream."
"I have tried to block those screams from my memory," Fenris drily replied. He helped Artie wriggle out of his pants and bent to nip at a sharp hipbone as it was exposed. "So how does our fair judge want us, then? I'm afraid there isn't any interesting Tevinter furniture in here to put to use. More's the pity."
Fenris nuzzled the inside of Artie's thigh, and Artemis let out a shaky breath, fingers carding through Fenris's hair, white strands against dark skin. And that was his elf, always asking what he wanted, and Artie wondered how he got so lucky.
"I want…" Artemis licked his lip as he considered. "I want to spoil you the way you spoil me. What would you like, hmm? I know you like my fingers and his mouth…"
That wasn't what Anders had expected at all, but he could manage. He rather liked the way Justice nearly purred at the taste of the lyrium in Fenris's skin — at the taste of Fenris's skin even where the lyrium wasn't, too. "I'm easy. Whatever the two of you want, I'm probably good for it. Unless it's actually a bad idea. I'll tell you if it's a bad idea."
Fenris's eyes lingered on Anders, almost as if he hoped to draw some inspiration from the easiest mage in Thedas. "What I want? I thought we were supposed to impress you with our talents."
"Adaptability is a talent," Anders suggested. "You want me to suck you off again, I'll do it. Without the chocolate this time. You want something more complicated, I'll hear you out, and probably do it. You don't usually have terrible ideas, that I've noticed."
Confusion crossed Fenris's face, as he finally looked up at Artemis. "You… want him to please me?" he asked, needing to be very sure what was happening.
"That was merely a suggestion," Artemis replied, pulling Fenris up into a kiss. "I want you to be pleased in whichever way would make your toes curl."
"I want you to touch me," Fenris decided, the words rushing out, before anything could stop them. "I want you to touch me with your fingers. I want him to touch me with his tongue. Anywhere. Everywhere. And the magic that tingles — I want that, too. I —" He stopped, suddenly, abashed, and glanced at Anders.
"I'm not hearing any bad ideas," Anders assured him, running one sparking finger across Fenris's knee. "This magic that tingles?"
Fenris nodded, eyes still uncertain.
"I think we can do that." Anders looked up at Artie. "Can we do that, Artie?"
"Can and will," Artie agreed, tracing a sparkling finger of his own along the back of Fenris's ear. Fenris shuddered, twisting as though he wasn't sure he wanted to lean into or away from that touch. Artemis couldn't remember the last time Fenris had asked for something so eagerly, and for a moment he wondered if that had been his fault, if he had been neglecting his husband's needs and desires. If so, he would be sure to make up for lost time, with Anders's help.
"Amatus," Fenris breathed. The look in his eyes turned from wary to cautiously hopeful. Artemis pressed a kiss to Fenris's forehead and nudged him towards Anders.
Anders's eyes were blue around the edges, but he spoke with his own voice. "Good thing I've developed a liking for Tevinter sausage," he said, licking his lips obscenely, walking his sparking fingers up the side of Fenris's leg.
That voice was enough to bring Fenris back to himself. "And here I was hoping there was some creativity left in you." He shot Anders a pitying glance. "Oh, I know, tattered old mage. Even your creativity is scarred."
"You are outrageously lucky I like you," Anders grumbled, squinting at the teasing smirk on Fenris's face.
"Prove it," Fenris replied, with a shiver of amusement that could have been a laugh if there were sound in it.
